And he passed through mount Ephraim, and … the land of Shalisha… Shalim … and the land of the Benjamites, but they found them not.
And when they were come to … Zuph, Saul said … Let us return; lest my father leave caring for the asses, and take thought for us.
And he said unto him, Behold now, there is in this city a man of God… now let us go thither; peradventure he can shew us our way that we should go. 1 Samuel 9:4-6; 19 (KJV)
WHEN the search for ‘meaning‘ seems endless
And each move takes you a step further from reason…
And you are sooooo lost…
That it seems safer to give up altogether…
Keep on … Read more
It’s another Children’s Day, and I’ve been musing on a critical attribute and how it relates to children.
That quality is a ‘major‘ in my culture.
You know those unwritten and unspoken ‘spices‘ of life.
Yet learn them one must, else he is sentenced to a life of unnecessary hardship regardless of who he is, where he is from or what he has- and more especially in this democratic era.
I often wonder whether this attribute is a virtue or a vice; and most times, I conclude that it must be somewhere in-between…
Talk of those faint lines anyone could easily cross without even noticing anything is amiss! Those things in life that could be as evil as they could be good!
My humble verdict however, is that on which side such things fall depends on our intention and the mode of application of the truth we know.
That is to say, in this case, diplomacy might be a virtue when beyond self interest, it takes into account the interest of others, and the common good of all. Any less noble agenda, especially selfishness would make it a vice.
All war represents a failure of diplomacy…
Part of diplomacy is to open different definitions of self interest
Nevertheless, this attribute has fast become a must-have soft skill for a smooth sail in our society- from river to coast, from the corners of our rooms to the board room…
In as much as I don’t believe in twisting the truth, I am also of the opinion that for a peaceful coexistence, there are times when one needs to use his discretion, especially in things he chooses NOT to say or do under certain circumstances.
It is all about being empathetic and sensitive to the needs of others.
But what is it about kids and Diplomacy?
Even children show what they are by what they do; you can tell if they are honest and good.
Considering the fact that I, for one, was never brought up to be diplomatic, (but to be myself and call a spade a spade in every given circumstance regardless of whose horse is gored), makes me often wonder if it is ever possible to teach some things to children without corrupting their simplicity and innocence.
Besides, there is this thought of how children often make grown-ups look silly when we demand from them things beyond their capabilities; for example, when we expect from them at least a little bit of more discretion in the tenderness of their age and stage in life.
For example, how on earth could someone teach a child to use her or his discretion especially in things she or he chooses NOT to do or say in certain scenarios without doing injustice to their pure and unfeigned innocence? Without corrupting the beauty of their simple hearts?
But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ
-2 Corinthians 11:3 (KjV)
Hmmmmmmm. Only God can give parents the wisdom required for such!
However in my humble opinion, and based on my own experience, some things are best learned with age- and not taught!
Now, To The Story…
This episode I’m about to share happened about twelve years ago, while spending some holidays at my elder sister Dammy’s place.
Her daughter Angela was about three then. (Angela is now 15).
While still hanging out in church after service one Sunday, a friendly neighbour, let’s call her Esther, offered Angela some candies out of goodwill.
Angela collected the candies with thanks, and started munching right away, forgetting to inform her Mum first as earlier instructed to do on such occasions.
Now, there was absolutely nothing wrong with the gesture. Besides, not seeking her Mum’s approval was not an unpardonable sin.
However, my sister hated candies and wouldn’t allow her kids touch any with a long spoon for the health of their teeth.
So you can imagine her horror when she came to the scene and found her daughter munching on candies!
You guessed right- Dammy was startled!
And without inquiring about where the candies came from, she calmly asked Angela to spit them and throw them in the trash can.
Angela obeyed without any resistance. I guess she already had enough anyway.
About a minute later, Esther appeared and chatted away with Dammy.
And as she was about leaving, she turned to Angela and asked,
“Where are the candies I gave you Angie?”
You can’t imagine Angela’s response!
With a shrill sharp voice and wide open eyes, Angela almost accusingly, but rather innocently exclaimed, “My Mummy asked me to throw them away!”
My sister went pale!
And as for me, I felt like taking to my heels…
If you are familiar with the African culture, I’m sure you’ll get the drift…
(Our love for community compels us to care about how Esther would be convinced that it wasn’t about her and that there wasn’t more to Dammy asking her kid to throw the candies away!)
If Angela had only been less blunt…(laughing out loud). If only she had said it more calmly -and explained better…
To healthy, brilliant and godly Children!
Funmi Adebayo (c) 2013
Even though we all claim to be busy, and justifiably so, if we take an honest review of what really keeps us engaged most of the time, our discovery will surprise us!
Our findings might be as simple as the difference between being busy and being productive, or as shocking as the difference between living and existing.
As a matter of fact, they might even be the clues to the greatest mysteries of our lives, and the bridge between our present status and our dream lives.
Prov.26:14 (KJV) As the door turneth upon his hinges, so doth the slothful upon his bed.
The real proof of ‘busyness’ is not activity or restlessness.
On the contrary, the only justification for ‘busyness’ is productivity. And productivity speaks through just one thing: Result!!!
Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment …Seeming to do is not doing.
- Thomas A. Edison
Really, how busy can we get?
As busy as Esau got searching for ‘The Blessing’ while a seemingly less ‘busier’ but apparently smarter Jacob outmaneuvered him?
Proverbs 17:24 (KJV) Wisdom is before him that hath understanding;
but the eyes of a fool are in the ends of the earth.
Really, we shouldn’t get too ‘busy’ for our own good… too ‘busy’ for our destiny!
Battle With an ATM …
While at a Teller Machine the other day, I discovered that there was no cash in my target account. I usually fund that account only when required for security reasons.
However, I had forgotten to do the necessary funds transfer via Internet Banking before driving to the ATM on that particularly occasion.
And I thought I heard the teller maching chuckle at me when I got the “Insufficient funds to complete your transaction” error message.
You can imagine the frustration!
Nevertheless, my dilemma was short lived, as I was armed with Mobile Banking facilities.
Therefore, I simply picked up my mobile phone, dialed my bank’s “Connect” number, and did the necessary transfer via Mobile Banking.
And in less than 2 minutes and amidst curious glares, I was able to cash enough money with my Master Card!
It was while driving off that the real reason why my little ‘escapade’ was such a spectacle hit me:
Besides bankers and few professionals, not too many people use such freely available tools like Mobile Banking in our culture!
For the erroneous belief that these facilities are meant for ‘techies’ or people with exceptional Intelligence Quotient alone, folks are much too lazy to explore, let alone use these tools, which are meant to make life easier actually; tools which just anyone can use!
It then occurred to me how ‘busy’ I would have gotten trying to do the same transaction physically and manually, if I didn’t have the freely available Mobile Banking facility within my reach!
For instance, what if I’d had to
- go inside the banking hall, fill a Savings Withdrawal Form, join the queue and get the cash over the counter, or
- go inside the banking hall, fill a Funds Transfer Form, wait my turn to get the fund transferred to my Master Card account over the counter and then gone back to join the queue and cash the funds at the ATM or
- return to work for online transfer and postpone cashing the funds till later.
Apparently, any of these options could have taken between 45 minutes and 48 hours (if I chose to procrastinate) of my precious time!
And definitely, this would have initiated a kind of chain reaction as many more things would have suffered for this single lapse, and I would have got ‘busier’ as a result. (Remember the Poem which reads
For want of a nail, a shoe was lost
For want of the shoe, a horse was lost
For want of the horse, a rider..
… The battle …
…(And) an entire kingdom was lost…
All for want of a horse shoe nail!
Can anyone picture that? And can you recount how much time you’ve once wasted getting busy over such unnecessary pursuits?
Beware the barrenness of a busy life.
These are kinds of things we very often waste our precious time (and of course, life) on every single day under the guise of ‘busyness’.
Time stealers actually!
We’d get more value for our time (and life in general) if we could cut out all such unnecessary pursuits.
In any case, to every laborious task is a faster, smarter and more productive approach. If only we knew better…
Value For Our Time (Life)…
Proverbs 3:13, 16 (KJV) Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding. Length of days is in her right hand…
The way out is to observe, get informed and act accordingly. Acting on such information as this is empowering!
The following are steps to take:
1. Observe and scrutinize your routines to discover all unproductive approaches to your tasks as well as habits which waste your time,
2. Explore smarter ways of getting things done.
And this might involve getting more conversant with some readily available solutions freely provided to make our works easier and lives better.
Tools like Mobile Money, Mobile, Internet and eBanking facilities, Hardware Token for Third-party funds transfer, Dropbox or GoogleDrive for online data backup and storage are examples, to mention but a few.
Talk of scaling territories in a jiffy and achieving more with less! Definitely,action based on knowledge is empowering.
Working/Living Smarter is a way to go!
Funmi Adebayo (c) 2013
Prov.24:10 (GNB) If you are weak in a crisis, you are weak indeed.
When Life Wouldn’t Cooperate:
You’ve worked hard, trained hard and prayed hard to be a management staff, and finally your promotion interview day is here.
Your interview starts 7:30am sharp- punctuality is part of the hurdles to cross.
You rise at 6:00, about 30 minutes late because you burned the midnight oil putting finishing touches to your preparations.
Thank goodness you’ve sorted out what to put on about a week earlier. All your remaining office wears are dirty, but the week-long preparation for the great day left you with no time to attend to laundry.
Gen. 30:31-36 (KJV)... What shall I give thee? And Jacob said, ...all the speckled and spotted cattle, and all the brown cattle among the sheep, and the spotted and speckled among the goats: and of such shall be my hire. ... And Laban ...removed that day the he goats that were ringstraked ... speckled and spotted, and ...Jacob fed the rest of Laban's flocks.